WORST DINGLEBERRY EVER
I havent dry-humped that much since freshmen year. Forgot how good it doesnt feel.
blow job with a beer in the shower, I just created the ultimate day spa for dudes
No... We were arguing over whose family is more dysfunctional... Then my brother stumbled in and puked all over jakes ugly dog.
just heard this guy tell a story about how he got boat head. i want his life
Have you been tested recently?
Well I got my shots when I was a baby so I think I'm immune
when you wake up try not to move. we are betting to see if more sprinkles stuck to you or the pong table.
I was masturbating in my bed this morning when my ipod alarm went off and it started playing "show me the meaning of being lonely"
Cute underage boy is in my house.
OH MY GOD. DON'T DO ANYTHING. WHY IS HE IN YOUR HOUSE.
For thanksgving we are only drinking wild turkey for the next 24hrs time to strap your balls back on and maybe a helmet
Ps we bought 8 pellet guns just now
Made out with a mannequin all morning in cpr training, so im ready to party
Lost feeling in my face, my shoe and had a nose bleed. That's not wings. Fuck red bull.
Whenever you have to pee or whatever I'll be over here to harass you
How proud should I be that I googled "dildo with wheels" and actually got the result I wanted?
You peed in the sink and kept shouting "I'm the black swan! Ca-caw!"
Randomize