I just puked in the mop bucket at work. I think I need to go home.
its like fishing. just send her some cock shots to keep her on the hook then use tequila to reel her in
Pretty sure I just had sex with the black kid who grew up in a car from "angels in the outfield"
How come I never meet celebrities?
searching my car for your cum before I have to give my grandma a ride to the airport. Thanks for this
Why does She think it's her duty to welcome in freshman through the welcome mat that is her vagina
don't say the first was when I crawled under into the dressing room
Dunno yet. Probably just gonna play the s.t.d. russian roulette game with random bartenders at the beach again. Same 'ol same 'ol
Do you have any pix of it limp? I wanna see the metamorphosis, like a cock caterpillar turning into a giant beautiful cock butterfly!
TOUCH YOURSELF. DO IT.
I don't think that's how you're supposed to sext
I swear to god little potato creatures live inside Belvedere bottles and claw at your throat as you swallow shots.
We were in the middle of fucking and she was just like "Do ya wanna play Harry Potter Scene It?" I musta been really bad lol Anyways, her tattoo healed nicely.
I would have been the big man on campus...just flop my wang out on the table and how them what they were gonna deal with if they dropped the soap
I just found a weed leaf in my leg hair..
Well I'm half drunk in a green tutu at a chipotle. So pretty good parade.
So if my boyfriend and I hooked up with the same girl it’s not like I cheated. It’s communal.
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