Gordon Ramsey's restaurant in NY is $150 each for the chef's menu
So you're taking me there this weekend?
oh, looks like he just opened a new restaurant right by us- it's called "McDonald's". Must be scottish food.
omh. i just found SHIT IN THE SHOWER! who the fuck does that? and why do i always seem to find it?
There is only so much cookie dough and masturbating I can handle in one night.
He has been begging me for a Bj but doesnt want to get mono
How is he gunna get mono? is he gunna suck on his dick after you?
There is a full size piano in the middle of our road. Please tell me you had nothing to do with this.
asked the girl next to us on line to take a picture of us and she shared her bacardi. i love white people.
I can't. I will literally throw up my liver
Why dont you be an ebola patient for halloween? You can totally throw up and itll be part of your costume.
Maybe it was silver. I don't know. I was drunk sifting through my dogs vomit.
All I can remember is posting my chicken burger in the post box. Postman is in for a treat.
This is not a costume party, I'm just wearing fairy wings.
Of course you are.
I mean I'm screaming I love the gays in the middle of Bart so yeah
This is the fourth day in a row I woke up with cheetos spread around me in a ritual pattern..this weed is unreal
yeah that bottle of rum is only the second thing I want that kid to be pulling out of his pants
I once took a shot of lighter fluid.. That's not a secret just a fucked up story
We found you in the bathroom at 1AM throwing money into the toilet making wishes. That drunk.
.... Seriously?
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