I just saw a license plate that said "Guidete" at college. This proves the world is officially ending in 2012
Is it bad when your hot neighbor is crying on her porch, and your 2nd thought is "maybe her boyfriend cheated on her and she'll want to fuck me for revenge sex?"
Perfectly normal.
Just finished putting caution tape around the tv. Sober me needs to prepare.
And then I passed out in my towel and was woken up by my roommate introducing me to her trick for the night.
I offered to buy ihop waffles for all the homeless people outside the metro. It was time to go to bed.
judging from the number of limes and box of kosher salt on the counter therell be 8.5 gallons of tequila drunk this weekend.
sounds about right
Wesley I'm sober and my body hurts. There wasn't much trust in any of those falls.
I'm going to teach Troy such valuable life lessons. Yesterday I told him to stay away from girls who drink redbull and vodkas.
Next think I knew I was pretty much using his penis as a microphone... No more playing Eminem during hookups
yeah...well...life isn't all puppies & lap dances
I felt like the hulk waking up from a black out except with munchies
And besides a nice relationship, I just really want to get laid damnit
i just watched a 7 minute video on people making a hot air balloon for their dog and i am a changed person
She deleted me on Facebook. I think it's safe to say that she knows I fucked him now.
As your boyfriend, I'm gonna congratulate you on winning that fist fight. But as a cop, I have to tell you to not do that again.
Randomize
