she just sneezed while going down on me. is it rude for me to ask her to do it again?
You held your own hair and threw up into a red cup...I think they were more amazed than upset.
i just successfully used the word "hymen" in a paper...welcome to senior seminar in lit.
Just threw up in nordstroms while shopping for moms bday with dad. He distracted workers for me. No more tequila
i have a wrist watched drawn on my wrist that it says shot o clock
But seriously he was like a god with his hands. My vagina feels annointed.
at first i was on the bathroom floor cuz i was hungover. now im just here because it is cool
Remember that time you bought snap bracelets on Amazon and they sent you 300 pregnancy tests instead? Amazon knows.
So my mind was like YOU ARE TOTALLY GONNA MAKE IT TO CLASS TODAY but then my body was all LOL NO YOU AIN'T.
Hey my vagina is like a company. Everyone has an equal opportunity....
Being able to fart in my own house is like 90% of why I pay rent
In other news, I had my first sex related injury of the school year so that's cool
Topless Tuesday? One of us will be really happy the other not so much.
We'll get you some ice cream, but no sprinkles. Sprinkles are for winners.
i now understand why vodka
Randomize