i just google searched "what time does taco bell open"
Just woke up. First thing I see: Little brother eating last night's jello shots thinking they're reg jello.
We left the house and she said "let's go dick hunting" theres no way last night was gonna end up well
who put toothpaste on EVERY doorknob in my house?!
booty call hours are between 1:30-3:00 AM thurs-sat with the exception of major drinking holidays and election days. please try again
i think this is the gayest thing you've ever shown me. and i'm pretty sure you've sent me pictures of a dude sticking his dick in a horse's nose.
It's still to early in our relationship to tell her I was sleeping in my car
As sure as my left ball is bigger then my right. We will have our moment.
Everyone here knows my boyfriend as "Half Baked". Life, he's doing it right.
Next Halloween I want us to dress up as jockeys, get drunk, and ride a carousel all night until we throw up or declare a winner
The paramedics were not my fault this time.
The dick pic bandit just sent me a poem about showering..
Nothing says "we're never gonna bone" like "nice haircut, it makes you look like my cousin"
do you ever look at a card in your wallet and reminisce about all of the drugs youve done with it?
It's always appealing to be able to say to someone "I banged your mom"
Randomize
