The answer is no. Its an illegal search n seizure!
You proceeded to call me a hoe and then informed me that Bear Grylls is and always will be more important than I am to you.
You said that we had to leave the party together and proceeded to repeat the "ducks fly together" speech from The Mighty Ducks word for word. Soon the whole party was quite and started chanting quack..quack...quack..
so,apparently a side effect from having sex on the beach is now i have a tanline shaped like your sister
i hate you
he said he wants to do me james and the giant peach style. im afraid of what that means. but moderately excited. wish me luck.
literally. a puddle of blood. on the floor. still searching for the source
Man when i saw they were the only ones hard core grinding to the Cha Cha slide against the wall, I knew they were gonna have sex tonight.
I got concerned once i realized you weren't there to hear us having sex. See I do worry about you.
I'm sorry I peed on your everything.
also Jesus you really need to change your diet. I just washed your baby gravy out of my hair and it's so acidic my hair is damaged. You have killer sperm
i threw up in his garden in front of like five people smoking a joint. they let me have a hit after i was done so it was okay
god it feels good to gold a bottle of opiates again.
I think that typo was actually more appropriate than what you intended.
She said she forgot something.. and when she came out she was carrying a garden gnome, and a bottle of vodka. she was too hot to question it.
It's a little weird that I'm blowing my wingman.
You know you're drunk when you have to be picked up out of a bathtub.
Randomize
