Raging hang over. 6AM finish. Shat on a bag of trash in an alley. D L that last bit.
Tell your sister I'm no fool. Or at least romanticize the notion of the fool.
a very overweight girl in the ER just said she trippped over the invisible wii jump rope and fell
they're scary. like turkeys that ate nuclear fucking steroids.
My gift to the freshman: I made an illegal stop, rolled out and dropped to my hands and knees and puked in front of the south campus dorms and about 20 families. Welcome to OSU
Howd you meet this guy?
I found him next to my pants on sunday morn.
Let me start this apology by saying you were the finest piece of ass I ever had.
I might have been fine if i had magic teleportation powers and could have skipped the car ride between bar and home
I accidentally lit my hair on fire and we broke the bed. How was your night?
They make twin pack pregnancy tests for girls like us
Bad news: I found out that girl you want has a boyfriend. Good news: she'll probably cheat on him with you. Better news: after seeing the way she treats him, that's the most interaction you're going to want with her anyway. Trust me.
I world jack off literally anyone now that I'm not related to.
Got high again and all I want to do is wave this flag around
I had to ask her to let go of my cock this morning so I could go home. She just kept saying "no, please, no..."
Any luck with the purse?
No, though I did find her weed. Also her sons name is King. I'm uncertain how I feel about that
Randomize
