My place. Tomorrow Night. Bring your liver, and something for it to do.
I totally give up. Optimus Prime just fell from the top of the Great Pyramid into the hypostyle hall at Karnak.
Today in psych we learned that you are a whore.
Me specifically?
Yep.
i don't think my life will be extraordinarily more meaningful if i let him put his tongue in my butthole.
i wanna give whoever invented massage chairs a blow job.
aw he's cute...not in a i wanna rip his clothes off way more of a put him in my pocket and keep him as a pet
And occasionally lick whipped cream off them abs
Exactly.
At what point did we agree that playing bocchi ball on the way to the liquor store was a good idea?
Based on the pics I have taken of hookups while they were passed out or sleeping, I have scientifically concluded that no two vagina lips are the same. They are like snowflakes.
You are not about to raise that baby deer, you can BARELY raise yourself... Return it to it's mom now.
Just re-gained consciousness in the freshman girls dorm. Normally this would be awesome but I'm on the floor surrounded by chicks doing their homework. This makes me uncomfortable but I don't think they know I'm awake yet. If I b-line for the door can you come get me?
That was like a fiery explosion of flailing arms and wonderful passion
I feel like I shouldn't have to explain to you why giving your cat weed was a bad idea.
How bad would it be if I wore out the dress we got peed on in. You're the only one who knows.
At this point it's more of an experiment to see how much actual bush growth is possible. See, being single can be both educational and surprisingly comfy!
I would climb him like a jungle gym. Enthusiastically and creatively.
Randomize
