I didn't say she couldn't, I said you shouldn't.
When i tried to give you something that wasn't tequila...like water....you kept saying it was against your religion.
I've always been the spiritual type.
i just did the math...im a product of my mothers birthday sex
I had to close one eye to read the questions on my final this morning. That hungover.
it's a gatorade, cheez its, and regret kind of morning....
My mom just admitted you were a good looking kid & if you weren't my friend & 30 years older she would do you. I'm going to commit suicide.
Just ate a whole pizza by myself. Wearing my indian headdress again. its really cool with the french braids. I look like fucking pocahontas or some shit.
Lube filled water balloons always make for a good time
My housemates are judging me because I'm high at 8am and making Spongebob shaped Mac and Cheese
They know nothing, John Stoned.
I think it's time to give up this life and become vikings. You in?
Teach me the ways of your demonic sorcery.
I'm sitting here with a band aid on my labia, this is a first
U wanna come over and watch talidaga nights. Ill make pancakes
What? It's 130 in the morning.
Aww come on i make bomb ass pancakes
you started putting peanut butter on your pubes.
Remeber when we went camping and fucked those two guys? Yeah me either but I'm covered in poison oak so I'm guessing it's from that.
Randomize
