I want to come over to your house, give you money for liquor, fuck you, and then kick it untill I have to go home. Was that blatent enough for you?
how can i change my meal plan to a keystone plan?
They had miseltoe over the keg.... thats cheating
Someone better explain the burnt stove marks on my bed.
I actually want to hang out with her with our clothes on. That's a big step up for me.
Im doing shots of vodka in the bathroom covered in pillows.
Tornado warnings are fun!
I hope you don't have to start the day explaining to me how you failed to turn "Can I practice my belly dancing in your apartment" into all night sex.
You can drink as much as you want but it's not gunna make her forehead any smaller
I was hoping it might at least fix her teeth
Look. You've gotta stop making this about you, and make it about my vagina.
I owe you a thank you for last night. Only you could go up to a guy, ask if he likes my boobs, and return later to find us in a full on dance floor makeout sesh. Well played.
The school security guard knows my name.... I think I'm missing some memories...
I was just tryna bring you beer girl. I should've known you'd be shirtless though
Thank you for holding my butt in a non-sexual manner when its cold. I appreciate you and your warm hands.
I just dominated some guy while wearing your moms thong
Thus began an intricate shell game of nude cardigan photos
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