So I'm sober and underage, being hit on by a groom-to-be with braces...is it a bad thing that I'm enjoying it?
why is it that everytime a half black man enters something boring, it suddenly becomes sexy to people? golf? the presidency?
names aren't important. just tell him all you want is a lil make out sesh and keep it moving.
We couldn't find any ping pong balls, so we used a fishing bobber. Could we be more country?
Maybe I should forgo underwear.
This is a family BBQ no?
no more heavy drinking durning the lady that cleans the office told me i have to emtpy my own thrash if i puke in it
I don't care if he was in that porno. He looked like he knew what he was doing.
Ok spinning in the opposite direction thatg the room was spinning was the worst advice ever
Whiskey??
It will be at least another 6 weeks before I say yes again. I'm bruised. I stole sex cards and a really nice pocket knife. I acquired a vial of my own blood. Talk about a yard sale...
Are you setting a date to bone me?
Are you accepting?
And I'm determined to make an Eiffel Tower happen sometime. I just don't know who will take the pic (first world sex problem?)
I was a bouncer for about 90 seconds until the real bouncers figured out that I was doing their job
Your dog took my vibrator out to the yard
We need a hype man... Like a DMX type dude to just up the ante constantly...
DO NOT THROW SOUP AT YOUR SCREEN
Randomize