So I don't have any furniture but we just skateboard drunk around the floor.
we have to go try and show our tits so we can get ID-free drinks at applebees
I have no memory of puking on someone. Was he cute?
can you buy anything in the cafeteria for less than $2? I spent the last of my laundry money on a chia pet
tip of the day : never have sex with a full bladder. it WILL lead to complications and a very unhappy partner.
And I'm PMSing. So if I'm not crying, I'm masturbating.
You started throwing frozen shot glasses at people and you kept saying "it's fine, they melt."
somehow he and i always have our deepest conversations after phone sex.
FYI, grandma is already drunk and using a bed sheet as a table cloth.
Let us bow our heads and pray that I don't throw up in the tub
Idk I think he's weird but he's also from Wisconsin so that might have something to do with it.
I swear to god he thought my ass was a bag of wine last night.
you were walking down the sidewalk and just puked. didnt even stop or slow down and just kept going. i was so impressed i didnt even tell anyone you threw up on passing peoples shoes.
Oh god...Did I just fuck a sugar granddaddy?!
my roommates gone so i can take codeine and sleep naked
Randomize