butt plug
anus plug
rubbish cock?
yes
you suck at this game today
so my bro's bff came over...we had an awkward "yeah we fucked and can fuck later, but let's just pretend it didn't happen in front of the family" hug.
I can't sleep so instead I'm thinking of all the things I would love to do to you right now
That's weird, I usually just count sheep
I don't wanna do a drive in or see a movie tonight. I wanna play some Golden Tee and butt fuck a girl in the bathroom of some bar and proceed with Golden Tee
How young is too young to ask my kid to make me a drink?
i don't care what she did to you. we are not having sex in front of your sister.
she just refered to her hymen as "the mrs"
I'm pretty sure I'm almost gay. Like, I'd do it if I had no choice. Like, if i were in prison I'd try it.
And he tried to make it as casual as possible by asking where i was going on vacation while he was poundin me.
You call it a hangover, I call it a baby squirrel burrowing its way out of my head.
My last google search of the night was "Things that cost $102.50"
My arms are hairy. And so Is my left leg. Just my left leg, the right is smooth.
Going to the u of w I constantly have that moment of, oh hey I felt you up at that rave at folk fest that one time. Winnipeg is too small.
I chased him for half a mile, lost him then somehow ended up at his house. Is that still considered stalking? I WAS drunk.
He fucked me over, so I'm going to do what any rational woman does. I'm going to get really high and have sex with his brother.
Randomize
