HIV tests are more positive than that guy
Just found 50 pesos and a coke spoon in my dads old shit. Gotta love the 70s
ok this guy next to me just sat down with a no joke, 10,000 page book, popped an addy, cracked open a red bull and opened the book to page 1.
as if moving home wasnt embarassing enough, mom picked up my laundry while i was gone. guess who needs to find a new hiding spot for his cum towel..this guy.
Well I'm glad to hear the fight wasnt over his small dick.
Last time I saw him the sun was coming up and he was asleep in the student wellness parking lot. For some reason people were peeing on him.
he turned down sex AND sandwiches. who the hell does that?!
seriously when did my vagina become a soup kitchen for the poor
the mechanics of walkigng feel weird right now everyone lools like a demon
what does alcohol mean
And then we made magical love in his room under a blacklight as his roommate and girlfriend argued violently in the living room
My dad just bought me a 40. I consider this our peace treaty.
Just remember, Dont make worse choices than american flag pants to your own birthday party
Well I smoked some weird shit and I think I peed on my phone.
Handcuffs. Recoverd. I'm a goddamn detective.
I'm owning this being a social human being thing tonight!
Randomize
