I wish you could order shots online.
He just asked me if his big had a curved penis. Awkward? I think so.
just found $310, wrapped in a rubber band, at the bottom of my sock drawer with a note attached stating, "Make it rain".
I always figured rock bottom would've involved more hookers
You should make it a point to use vocabulary that is competition appropriate around him, like "champion" and "training" and "victory sex"
Just had a memory of you pretending to be a begging dog putting your head on my lap while I fed you. Great night to try a new drug.
I miss eating meals at a table and having unprotected sex..
I just invented spray cheese vodka. tastes real nasty but does the trick.
I'll answer your question with a question: Are you gonna be too high?
I just think his face would be more attractiveif it was framed by my thighs
Did you take the bag w/your drugs & cookie cutter?
I think I accidentally invented a religion.
I have no concept of chastity or moderation, she is a Catholic guilt poster child, how could I not try to hit that
Watching Supernatural does more for me sexually than the physical encounters with 90% of the men in my life.
Just letting you know that your little sister is now your eskimo brother. You can send a thank you edible arrangement to Tammy.
Randomize
