I got fucking wesley sniped last night by that power hoe. How'd it end up on your end? Did you canoodle the stripper enough for her to agree to go to formal?
i dont think my parents would of encouraged me to save years of birthday money if they knew what i would eventually spend it on
You're being dramatic. You can calm down, or you can piss off. Either way, I ate your burrito.
Go ahead. I tried to back up ur budhism story but she mite be catching on
Dammit. I hoped that would work. Just tell her I'm doing my pilgrmidge to Nepal or something.
and lets be real... who can blow a middle school class's sunday school teacher and keep a straight face ever again? NOBODY.
When a guy wants to eat something off you and then comes back with microwaved strudel and custard, back the fuck out. I have apple-chunk burns on my tits.
Your stories are the best. I feel like you're a spy among the heteros. It's not fair.
Telling the family you're going for a run, getting dressed in workout clothes, and then walking halfway around the block and smoking a joint. This is my life
Sometimes you have a glimmer of a heart and then I immediately remember you are dead inside.
Nothing says Happy Holidays like sending a picture of your ass to the wrong manager.
Why is it I can't go buy redbull and tylenol pm from a store without getting questions about my health choices?
I'm shrooming way too hard to deal with your bullshit at this particular point in time
She was cleaning herself at the bus stop. She also picked up gum off the ground and ate it
I must be pretty memorable. I was walking past this dude and he goes "There's the Scotch Girl." I have ZERO clue who he is, but I'm definitely the Scotch Girl.
Tell me you're alive little brother. And please tell me you didn't get arrested. You made no fucking sense last night in your random texts and pictures you were sending me.
Randomize
