these pics are all outta focus - was this what the camera saw? or what your eyes saw?
she says it's "been amazing lately"
i think basically because i hate her so much i'm trying to break her in half
You totally narrated your dogs thoughts for 2 and a half hours last night, and I was enthralled. I didn't say one word, I just listened.
Hey. I can't work your space dryer so I'm wearing your blanket home. I'll get my clothes later. Fun party!
He got kicked out 3 times. I have no idea how he kept getting back in. I saw him walking on the highway the next morning.
do you think this outfit says "I maintained my dignity this weekend"?
You got kicked out after 30 minutes, 3 beers and 2 shots. Group record. Also you kept rubbing his belly and calling him buddha.
Best case scenario: sex with hot bartender \nWorst case scenario: no sex and punched by tattooed guy that may or may not be said bartenders boyfriend.
I don't have the resources to adequately explain this. I need like a Powerpoint presentation and also Vodka.
If you ever "miss" working, I'm going to fist you with my hulk hands. BOTH of them.
he accidentally put it in my ass, i liked it but didn't tell him that and "accidentally" took his weed.
He gave me an extra phone charger for the other side of the bed the other night. Is that love?
He lured me round with the prospect of sex and then made me proofread his CV and spoon. I fucking hate this guy.
Looks like it rained condoms in my room last night
we are the best best friends ever. You had sex in an ice cream truck I had sex in a fire truck
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