dude chill. it wont be anything like your seventh grade birthday party.
So how gross is it that Woopie Goldberg has a vagina? She's like the exact opposite of a boner....
it's circumsized.
I think this conversation is over.
so its official, girls can see a boner through my snuggie.
They're like penises that have been put in a blender.
I think this breakup is Gods way of telling me I deserve a bigger dick
And I'm ok with his balls touching my ass
He started screaming when he saw my dog. He thought it was a polar bear
IT ISN'T. I'M A LITTLE HIGH.
YOU'RE ALWAYS A LITTLE HIGH.
NO. IT'S RARE THAT I'M A LITTLE HIGH. I'M ALWAYS HIGH AS FUCK. THERE'S A DIFFERENCE.
THE VODKA TRAIN IS NOW PULLING INTO THE STATION
I just ordered $70 worth of pizza and I'm not even ashamed. Happy Valentine's Day to me.
My roommate just threatened to kill me with my own pan. Can I ever get away from the crazies?!
All our friends are getting married, and I'm the dateless guy bringing molly to their weddings.
He said he broke his back in 3 spots & my first thought was "there goes my booty call".
Did u have a 2nd thought
I need a new booty call.
He’s basically a sexual superhero. A mild mannered marketing intern by day, but a very horny 22 year old with pornstar stamina at nights!
Randomize