There is now a Twilight themed dildo. What do YOU want for christmas??
just took batteries out of my vibrator to play wii guitar hero. think i am gonna regret that move later tonight.
So the guy sitting next to me is watching dungeons and dragons on youtube. I didnt realize you could get more pathetic than actually playing the game.
only you would photoshop your dick
Tonight's Real World episode reinforced the well-known fact that men of any caliber can hook up with girls named "Crystal"
Is King's over? Or do I still have to say 'On Matt's cock' at the end of every sentence on matt's cock?
He gave her the shocker .. I didn't know people really did that.
I was so high I thought there were pigeons in my room. Long story short there are now donut crumbs all around my bedroom.
walking on campus just saw the exact moment some kids life got ruined
he's on the phone and just starts going "FUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUCCCCCCCCKKKKK", then follows it with "Are you sure your pregnant?"... made my day
I could write a book on how to barely get by in community college. I just took an online quiz on my phone, at the bar, 6 minutes before it was due.
I'm handcuffed to your bathroom sink. Save me.
Nuts. Absolutely nuts. she just screamed in my face something about not knowing whats happening and then got tackled by a dude
The real reason I can't work: it's Tuesday. I get stoned and watch Buck Rodgers on Tuesday.
wanna mail me your GoPro for St.Patties and I'll mail it back to you coverend in puke?
Guess who's now on the no-fly list? If you guessed me, you'd be right.
Randomize
