I had a dream last night that we were eating cake at Mercy...hahaha. I'm furious I didn't see you.
MTV Made just made me cry. Where have all of my life goals gone?
I CAME AT YOU WITH RAW FEELING
you grabbed my dick through my pants and hissed at me.
Missed another period
I almost hope you're pregnant, this is unfair.
I've awoken at 3am again, in a night terror, just thinking about how big his dick was.
She kept crying and asking why I couldn't look more like Dennis quaid.
There is a hatefuck that has the destruction level of an atom bomb raging through my viens just aching to vaporize her.
Why must everything this weekend have to do with something going into or coming out of my vagina?
Ur wingman ability is causing serious doubt
Ok first off its WAY easier if you are actually here
I woke up in a chipotle parking lot with an industrial sized box of condoms and a bag of dounut holes. I need Jesus
I just saw a guy in a hazmat suit riding a tractor.
Don't forget to make sex 3rd on your calander
He plays guitar, sings like an angel, and acts like a gentleman. If I don't fuck him by the end of first semester, I'm dropping out
I'm totally picking out my shrooming outfit and blankets right now
Happy 20th birthday! I hope you like anxiety and having your debit card declined at McDonald's!
Randomize
