just watched an entire episode so you think you can dance for head. so wasn't worth it
So then the officer asked you how you were getting home and you told him "very carefully"
just saw a former disney star do a keg stand. her life choices have improved.
there is no excuse for drinking mascato in your room alone while listening to one-hit wonders from the 90s
Love is....waiting for your girl to throw up her shot in the bathroom...then handing her her beer. Game face.
Dude I am allergic to the candy dicks from that sex shop in Vegas. Come take me to hospital right now.
Gotta get dat. Gotta get dat. Gotta get dat dat dat dat dat ~uterus contraction~
who has a one night stand on Christmas ? But he's pretty attractive so thumbs up
I'm glad we can *facepalm* it together over the married couple we fucked separately.
He's nice to look at and knows the difference between your and you're. I win.
I lick assholes and I wouldn't eat mdma
Just left the ER. Only good thing... my hot ass nurse Carlos stripped me.
God works in mysterious ways.
I am 11 times too hungover to give the eulogy
I'm having to shit out rocks
i have a serious question for you... Why I am i not wearing any pants?
Randomize
