you opened the fridge, pissed on the food, fell over, then threw up on yourself. thats whats all over the kitchen.
Coffee flavored vodka sounded like such a good idea at the time. Now i never want to drink coffee again.
My BOSS just pulled out a box of Christmas stuff labeled reefs.
The bubbles in my bathtub are singing to me in german....
just heard this guy tell a story about how he got boat head. i want his life
Just took 11th shot of tequila. I may puke in my bear head.
I take that as "no I'm not driving you to the bar in a blizzard"
I've wasted nicer days than this hungover and dry heaving in bed.
Well at least you learned that cops don't like when you call them frenchy. Nice dive over the fence by the way.
I have a new philosophy. Fuck wearing bras, it's summertime.
He took the Gold in Olympic clit licking last night. Canada should be proud.
Will i get arrested If i steal the salvatiion arny guys bell for ringing it to close to my hangover
Yah... You need to get here. Evan just peed off the karaoke stage.
I just want to sing to him and rub baby oil on his head
I am getting off work an hour early just to watch you drink. Never let it be said that I don't love you.
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