Dude, she looked like the Canadian Slam Poet, neck hair and all.
Dude pussy is like music. For every person who pays for it, there are thousands more getting it for free.
The irony of calling it Pride is that you do things that no one should be proud of.
Three of the best words ever! Cocaine. Research. Study.
I now have an ENTIRE drawer of unused disposable silverware from Boston Market... and you guys said I needed to "buy" kitchen stuff
Hows that studying goin for you?
I'm in my bathtub in a robe and jeans smoking a bowl and my hair is covered in olive oil
I might have been fine if i had magic teleportation powers and could have skipped the car ride between bar and home
Either I'm deep cleaning my apartment out of severe academic procrastination or I'm subconsciously nesting and need to take a pregnancy test.
Germany has fetish clubs for everything. We are going to Germany. Germany is our friend.
It's always nice when a total stranger hates your ex just as much as you think they should.
Im shooting goldshlager and waxing my crotch
IT'S LIKE LOOKING INTO GOD'S VAGINA!!!!
He drove me to my therapist appointment because I was too drunk to drive. Total keeper.
Hey bring in backup. its going to take a lot more beer than we think to fill up the water bed...
Also I literally googled "how to fold socks" so that's how my day is going. How's yours?
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