who cares. he's ugly and has a dick this big -->
she read insantiy as in-nast-tit-ty and asked what the hell does that mean...
I just saw a girl in Albersons in spandex and curlers buying PBR. Only PBR.
i just opened the overnight bag i packed at 2am last night. Apparently all i thought id need was a handful of quarters, mascara and one sock
He said he got a lot of action last night. I asked how much? And he said he got to see down her shirt. Freshmen never cease to amaze me.
Im only slightly posetive that left over guacamole and wine are unacceptable for breakfast at 6.30 am
If turning my entire backyard into a slip-n-slide is wrong then I don't wanna be right
Its... i dont even know. theres lots of rap music and i cant find my shoes
You're alright. You just passed out while we were having sex. Then I'm pretty sure you peed. So I went home.
Bro, I just googled 36 year old pussy so when I do see it I won't be shocked.
I don't think I'm allowed to have Burger King. What if i just chew for taste and not actually consume. Like a wine connoisseur for fast food
The fact that me being able to walk down stairs is an accomplishment in my books pretty much explains how I am
it’s my vagina i can do what i want to
So drunk me is not subtlety trying to get her boss to cheat on her husband and have a lesbian affair with me. Sober me is ok with that.
Soon to be ex is nowhere to be found. Her attorney/new BF just showed up. 30 minutes late looking hungover. Pretty sure I'm getting the kids AND the house!
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