So do you want to come over? ;)
Never again opening up the Pandora's box of crazy that is your vagina. Sorry.
By the way the awkward moment from yesterday is now a bad situation I have to figure out.
Thank you Grey Goose.
come home now. i got a twizzler tangled in my hair again
He's either a really good actor or an actual prince, I'm fine with both so I'll sleep with him.
iPhone photo doodle is awesome. I gave my vagina some lazers and sent it to him. He has a whole series waiting on his phone for when he gets off the plane.
Oh and I found some acid for the drive back to school, productive day
I feel like someone had their period in my eyes.
I'm sorry I got a little outta control last night.
Sorry I dragged you across a parking lot
My night consisted of weed, sex, and Mexican food. In that order. I think we found the keys to saving our marriage.
Drank a beer through my butt, how's your initiation going?
If the sex wasn't incredible why would I compare it to cheesy tots
just woke up on the floor with a bottle in my hand. and by bottle, i mean a baby bottle. half filled with tequila.
you took my virginity. you can't have my alcohol too.
Wanna guess where my charger was last night.....in my cooler with my beer. I put it in there because I knew I would never forget my beer.
Oh, did your mom say anything else about my butt?
Randomize
