Pretty sure i didnt get thrown out cause why dont i have more bloody areas
Someone jacked my earrings off me or I threw em in the toilet again
I hate when that happens
I just used cruise control in a 25 zone. When will this hangover end???
I can't tell you what you just drank, that would ruin the point of Mystery Monday.
I'm not surprised. You have the libido of an Italian soccer team.
The least you could do is send me some gibberish so I know you're alive.
Fuhga
Thank you.
In other news it turns out I like Heineken.. In a desert island kind of way
Life Goals: never under any circumstances, pee in an elevator again. No matter how drunk
Find me a cup with a lid so I can illegally drink in your car. I'll be there in bout 10 minutes.
seriously though if NH has the largest penis size... the rest of America must be very disappointed.
I'm turning into an adult here.
Adults touch each other's special zones.
like, you weren't just lying there, you were wrapped in what appeared to be the skin of a wolf, chanting doomsday prophecies
THE END IS NEIGH
That's not the problem. The problem is I thought I was over him but he smells nice today.
We peed on a building I think...like a building in downtown...not out of view of anyone.
I came twice and when I was done I petted his head and said "you did good kid you did good" and just laid back smiling. Tell me I'm not awesome.
Randomize
