Sexting assembly today. Fuck yes
The way I see it, if i don't fail the midterm and blow off some of the projects, how else am I going to get motivated to study for the final ?
Two hours into move in day and the ambulance is here already.
it was pretty much a given that i would lose my thong on dollar tequilla shot night
I have now slept with people from more countries than Ive actually visited. Can we make this a game somehow? Like foreign fuck buddy bingo?
Listen man this isn't about soccer. It's about America and day drinking... Your two favorite things now get your ass over here
Well I will be attending the wedding with a flask of wine, potentially with a straw, and POM POMS for cheering purposes. Needless to say I will be well lubricated by your arrival..
the fact that i already established a hook up buddy for thanksgiving break is genius
I peed my pants and am still dancing with guys at the club because I liked my outfit too much to change. Call the ratchet emergency
He's tying my arms above my head and all I can think is that I should've shaved my armpits
I'm in your room because it's a safe space. Is it ok to pee in here?
You know if we weren't hooking up I think we'd actually be friends
He better be a good lay, these underwear cost $50.
It's your birthday, you should get to jizz where you want to. Jizz when you want tooo
Blacking out in the security line at the airport is not nearly as fun as blacking out in the lunch line at the dining hall.
Randomize
