He was actually able to throw up in the bucket from the top bunk. im impressed.
If i die in the snow, get to my laptop and delete all of the nickelback. password is "barry"
as in "white"?
No... We were arguing over whose family is more dysfunctional... Then my brother stumbled in and puked all over jakes ugly dog.
You had me at "you have a nicer rack then her"
No, I've only ever seen his brother's dick. So when I have lucid sex dreams, I just do a little cut and paste in my mind and stick his bro's package onto him.
He took the bartender's challenge and took a Jello shot with a tarantula frozen inside.
Well at least you learned that cops don't like when you call them frenchy. Nice dive over the fence by the way.
If he tries to stick his thumb up my butt again im going to rip his dick off with my vagina
I told you those kegels would come in handy one day
Go big or go home. Or get a live in house boy you met 7 years ago and feel like you have unfullfilled potential. You know, the usual
Buying her a drink is like giving a seagull a French fry, all you're gonna do is get annoyed and shit on
Now I'm obligated to stay and cuddle with her because the condom broke. Fuck.
We tried the hang n bang, remember? You ruined it by crying and telling me you loved me while blowing me.
"Wine night with the girls" turned into me having to set an alarm in the bathtub this morning...
In bathroom. Hand in air with cell phone. Help.
can you come here so we can have really loud sex? the girl upstairs walks so loud i want her to know how it feels
of course
Randomize
