Ah I wish I was there to nurse you then clean up your piss-filled water bottles
for some reason the bedside piss missed the water bottle today
Remember when we were trying to guess how many people could fit in my shower? The answer is 7
hot pretzels for dinner, snacks, and now breakfast...oh to be a poor college student...everyday is like a carnival.
Theres a dude at this concert at the urinal double fisting beers, taking drinks from both while simultaneously pissing euerywhere. He is my hero
New Years Resolution for 2011 : QUALITY cock. Not quantity.
Just remembered when I bought that round of shots I told the girls to "get their whore friend" who was making out with her bf instead of drinking. I don't know why they stayed.
I threw up sweet potatoes. Worst thing to throw up ever. They came back mashed.
Seriously I will never run in my wedges while drinking racing home to have sex ever again
It was about the point the universe collapsed in on itself and I was a singularity of insanity that I realized I was tripping balls.
Very excited! Vodka will be shot, dicks will be ridden, and memories made.
I wasn't trying to be rude when I hurriedly walked past you, but I can not put in to words exactly how bad I had to shit.
Was that you I seen riding on the top of a cab? Way to start the new year
i need some food
Holy shit I forgot about you stabbing him.
this temple that is my body is starting to crumble and turn into ruins
Haha I had a heart to heart with a stripper so I would say it was a success?
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