call me tomorrow and ask me about coke-whore stripper. It hasnt happened yet, but im sure it will be plenty disappointing.
It was confusing and full of hummus
I know I'm really high but I swear I just saw him beating off to his fantasy football roster.
i have more money on itunes than i do in my bank account... college.
Just got to costco. Where are you?
Liquor aisle, bring another cart.
Apparently I did my philosophy paper last night. It's not bad either.
Its midnight, he's burning water on the stove and keeps yelling at me and telling me not to burn myself.
yes we did fuck in his chapter room. yes it was demeaning. and yes, they probably will discuss it at chapter tonight.
I just closed two deals on my laptop from my bathroom while smoking a bowl, like a bawssss. Working from home is my favorite.
PA to anyone at the party last night and wondering where your pants are: they are in my backyard.
I'm high. Everything has a 45° angle. That is as far as my eyes open
So how exactly do I backtrack from motorboating and ass grabbing?
Prerry sure I narrowly avoided being tazed by a swat cop last night... But on the up side, we found my purse.
If I had a penis, I'd want to put it in you. And I'd treat you with respect and pay for your drinks.
MILK DIDN'T HELP. IT'S NOT HELPING
Randomize
