true best friends attempt to put quarters in each others butts. Thanks for the best birthday ever!
Covered in glitter and dick. 2010 feels a lot like 2009.
the girl next to me in class is drinking a margarita out of a slurpee cup. i know your going to ask how i know its a margarita and the answer is i can smell the tequila. i never want to leave this place
It's too hard to jack off and hold an ipad at the same time
I guess I just got drunk and ordered a mini fridge off the internet. At least now I know the 200$ that was missing from my checking account wasn't spent on lap dances only.
Why is Kyle using one of my nieces as a blunt object to provoke and attack my other niece?
Beer coozy in the gym. Don't judge me.
I am dressed. And we didn't do anything. He's gorgeous and tall tho. Something nice to look at when I'm hungover
That was nice of you. Thank you for respecting the fact that I got cockblocked by a sophomore last night.
Its mothers day, andI woke up with 12 bar stamps on my face, holding orange juice and a box of tampons. This can not be happening
i'm covered in glitter and body paint WTF
We're showing the video later bring pizza
There are both cum and chocolate stains on my sheets. Can't decide whether this is a new low or a new high.
Thanks for the bagel and the sex.
When you wear a dress that resembles the shape and color of Kirby to a wedding, you get the attention you deserve.
And then there was cum in my hair and he was making beans.
Randomize
