i know ur right I'm sorry I'm stupid and incompitent look I can't even spell incompetent right! Fuck!
What's proper 1 nite stand etiquette?
Say hi to his dad and make him some breakfast.
Yeah, my mom walked in on us. Instead of yelling, she went and hid in the bathroom til we finished. It was pretty classy.
it's great music for shaving your balls
You better not fucking die before we have sex while you blow fire. I'm serious. Don't mess up my sexual bucket list.
well its a long story but basically i overcame many cockblocks
I woke up and took my shirt off, and there was what I was assume to be pieces of tree in my chest hair. Any ideas about that one?
You're putting the star player on the bench. You dont put Michael Jordan on the bench.
Are you referring to my vagina as Michael Jordan?
I can't get over how you look like his sister and he wants to fuck you.
We hooked up for a while and on his way out he high fived me and said "stay weird"
I needed 3am water. Not 3am shots of rum.
I just fell out of my doorway to go to class so if that doesn't describe how my night went idk what will
I was intimate with him for twenty minutes and will be intimate with shame for twenty years.
Note to self: Calvin Klein's are not safe to shit in.
I just puked into a clean basket of laundry.
Randomize
