I use a guy for sex and get three minutes out of him. go figure
Dont worry, she is sitting right next to me. She is making it clear she wants to scissor
census says that i am hotter than the girl you just left with...sad for you
Oh, don't even get me started. Harry Potter is so pure. Twilight is just teenage girl porn.
there's a girl in the library on mysapce. she must have missed the memo.
I'm out of vodka and money. My semester is officially over. The way I see it, my finals are just forms I need to fill out in order to leave campus.
I'm still trying to decide if it's a complement when he said "I'd like to subscribe to your daddy issues".
i mad aa ber float. budweiser nd ice creem. it amzig.
Mystery lines found in a Pyrex dish in the back of my pantry at 415 am. No recall as to it's origin. Unidentifiable taste. Obviously I'm doing them
That's what you get for drunk dialing me to ask what kind of flowers I like while outside of a strip club, after telling me you "made it rain"
I masterbated to the rocky theme song. I'm pretty sure that just beat any sex experience I've ever had.
We put a ban on pants at an unusually early point in the night.
Props to you. You took the bet seriously. Making out with her for an hour right after she spewed
You said the best orgasm you ever had, you gave to yourself. your boyfriend looked really disappointed. so did half the room.
I remember you banged her while I was dying on your couch, so good call
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