You know you want to come over later
1:27a: Um no
1:45a: Maybe
2:05a: Probably
2:38a: I'm outside, let me in
also, you're talking to the girl for whom "deformed baby arm" wasn't quite a dealbreaker.
drinking steel reserve before noon and watching the price is right... 211... bet i pass out before then.
I didn't have a rubber, but my dick had a date with a clorox wipe after we finished. I think I'm in the clear.
Just watched Hilary Duff have a three-some on Gossip Girl...all I could imagine was that LIzzie Maguire cartoon girl freaking out above their heads
Dude, I think my check liver light just came on
bring money and cleavage
I've come to realize time passes slowest when I'm sitting in class, waiting for microwavable foods, working out, & giving head.
I told her that I thought she needed an oral mammogram. With me being pre-med she bought it.
it's official, i've been high in 26 different states, and three different countries.
I found out why they kept calling her "CD". It was short for "Crab Dip". You're fucked.
chimney cleaner pole that expands when button is pushed then pull out. Remember that. We have to patent it.
Who are you high with right now?
Come now. I'm bloody but I'll give you the best fuck of your life.
I called you a cum goblin in my voicemail. I stand by it.
I don't know what happened last night. But I just woke up in the high school boiler room
Randomize
