we went to that german restaurant and drank out of the boots. Then I threw up into one
i think i've said "don't judge me" 10+ times tonight... is that a bad thing?
yes
... don't judge me
so he just left - touched my cheek like he was gona kiss me and then gave me a fist bump?
tonight is proof that a xbox 360 will always be more reliable than a girl ever will
and a girl gets the red ring of death every month
It's finally official that I am from Oklahoma. I'm currently sleeping with my ex-fling's brother.
Unemployment check just came in. As soon as I stop pretending I have morals I'm buying weed. Puff puff pass uncle sam.
He spent $1100 at a strip club. If I had that kind of disposable income, I'd make a cocaine sandcastle.
No I got myself stoned. With her bowl. She was just a casualty of the War on Sobriety.
if it doesnt flame it aint got game is a bad drinking motto eyebrow-wise.
eyebrows regrow, your balls dont
How does she have a hairless cat and a husband it's not fair. Both are hard to come by
My stripper pole led lights flash with the sound so it's awsome with music
He wore socks while I was giving him head. I couldn't even focus on his penis because of the socks.
I CLEANED MY BATHROOM FOR YOU!! betrayal
Act your age.
I am. I'm acting like a drunk 20 year old.
WTF. I was 99% sure I went straight home last night. I just woke up hugging a chair, and my tux pocket has a flask filled with what I think is red bull and gatorade. This has to be your doing.
Randomize
