She says ass holes are for stuffing, the verb, not stuffing, the noun.
If you're ever in Seattle we should Fuck. Or get coffee, whatever.
who do I fuck, the girl waiting for me upstairs or her roomate making me mac and cheese right now?? This is the single hardest decision I've always wanted to have to make
He came on my chin and called me cumbledore. i give up.
Harry Potter. Singing. Sobering up. In that order.
she just pulled a hulk hogan to make her point. no idea how it helped
I just looked at the guy in the car next to me and he was wearing a divers mask. We just nodded cause we both understood.
FUCK YOU. AH. FUCK BOTH OF US MORE BOOZE.
MAS TEQUILA.
I have learned that if you don't want to hook up with the guy who walked you home, food is great compensation.
I dunno. We kind of want to have a hippie communing with nature type break. But because we're such alcoholics I feel like we'll just be wasted the whole time in addition to hugging trees and shit
DOMA is dead. I'm definitely going to be the last of our friends to get married now.
It will be interesting
Isn't that your life's motto?
every time someone would wish me happy birthday I would be like "thanks happy birthday to you too"
Maid of honor screwed up the joke so I just got to explain what a strap on is and why a married lady might want one to Grandma and my brother's wedding shower.
Awww I'm so proud! Starting friendships before you hook up!
Randomize
