the whole time he was cumming, he did the joey lawrence WHOA. over and over. WHOA. WHOA. WHOA. WHOA.
I just put on my hot pinky lace thong... you know what that means! ;)
Oh god. Slutty you is on the run. Someone needs to alert the city.
We're so high we're finding things in the room to build a submarine with. So far we have two cardboard boxes, a piece of wood, puffy paint, and an empty bottle to use as a periscope.
Just woke to a Christmas wrapped pack of hotdogs in my bathtub. How high did we get?
And next time please put a text between discussing my orgasms and discussing your son - that was weird.
Dude, I need a lifestyle change. I'm to old to be making out with chicks in foam parties, letting older chicks get all excited because I let them put their hands up my shirt, and running around doing scavenger hunts with 18 yr old chicks.
It doesn't feel like real life when you open your hotel room door and the first person you see is wearing a rabbit costume. I'm too hungover for this.
hes that one kid that offered to spoon after staring at me for 5 minutes
I had wine for breakfast at 6am, that's how visiting my parents went.
I would do everything over again, except the fireball.
Ultimate fat girl moment: I promised him my mouth for the night if he bought me a funnel cake..
What happened last night? I'm too scared to get out of bed and see the destruction.
First of all, check to see if that naked guy is still alive. He didn't look to be breathing when I left
You should probably come home from vacation now. I make badddd decisions when you're gone.
Do you think Root Touch Up or Just for Men would work better on pubes?
It was weird, it was like my heart got a boner. Is this being an adult?
Randomize
