hooking up with chicks might be the way to go after all. walk of shame looks better in her clothes.
The beer is more important than you right now.
Just drove through Taco Johns wearing a drug rug and no pants. When I rolled down my window, the girl paused for a minute before saying "um... 4.07"
he was like the dessert in the all you can eat man buffet that has become my life.
All I remember is apologizing to his sister for being a bad influence while I was throwing up into a big gulp cup.
I would compare it to a jeffrey but in smoothie form. More drugs in here than Bobby Brown's sock drawer.
That's the best thing about having gay dads, you don't gotta do shit on mothers da and everybody is down wit getting wasted on mimosas at brunch
I wonder if the fact that I'm listening to the theme from lion king gives my neighbors the impression that im tripping faceeeee
Miscalculate d the jungle juice, it's actually 10%. Can't taste the diff anyway but my stomcha is warm. Come play pongm.
Who the fuck cries when they're stoned?!
Sorry man I just really wanted a McChicken
Did we pole dance in front of my boss last night or was it just me?
Dude you're fine. You're 5 minutes away from your house and you're eating fig newtons
Once again, marijuana saves me from going to jail
I think someone is dead in a car across the street
Scratch that, dude's getting a blow job
Listen gotta draw the line somewhere. Apparently that line is at my nuts.
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