I hate bills.
Like ones you have to pay or people named William?
She said if it slipped out one more time she was going to duct tape it in her vagina
she has over 3,000 tagged photos on facebook. dont tell me she isnt annoying.
I just opened up the mens room door to a dude pissing in the urinal and pointing at himself in the mirror
We role played last night. I was Brandon Inge and she was some slut from Toledo. Let's just say Triple A might not be so disappointing after all.
The last mom I slept with was the worst lay ever. Imagine fucking a hairy wet pillow for 60 minutes. Good luck with your milf. I was joking about the Susan Boyle comment btw.
Why yes actually, getting stoned and reading an AARP magazine IS totally where I wanted my night to end!
With your fertility you would just get contact pregnant
You were all "think outside the box, inside the bag!" as you filled your camelback with beer.
Last night you said you were going to stop drinking and then proceeded to dip cookies in your vodka.
Sadly that explains a lot.
You continued to run around saying "free the nipple" while "taste testing" every liquor on the premises.
We used to bone, but now she's my life coach.
I still can't believe a guy pooped in my backyard
Gave his drunk ass water, & he poured it on my shirt while saying "WET T-SHIRT CONTEST!" When reminded of it today he replied with, "at least you came in first place"
Holy shit dude........stairs
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