And she was only 16?
You say that like it's a bad thing.
I love the "adulterer" look on you. It's hot.
Its part of my fall instant classic line.
Last night was epic. Hooked up with Emma Watson, found twenty bucks, and then passed out on my floor.
No you didn't. You drank unbelievable amounts of 151, passed out in someone else's bathroom, and we carried you back to your floor. Nice dreams though.
Just discovered Kim Possible porn. Life is now complete.
He snuck into some random hotel's continental breakfast at 3 AM and then passed out on a bench in the lobby. When the cops found him they made him empty out his pockets. No phone, no ID just muffins.
He was singing "i gotta feeling" under his breath as i was pulling my top off.
i figure i've seen his cum stains on the floor, i'm allowed to say these things.
Her parents walked in on us. So for my birthday they bought me a blow-up doll with their daughters face on it. I don't know what to think right now.
apparently the bartender would rather give me free shots than tell me that my whole nipple piercing was hanging out
Yea you just drank all the Hookah water, then started talking gibberish about the Kool Aid you just drank.
I also found a beer label in my bra and I'm pretty sure you put it there and said "this means I trust you"
Nothing like hearing "I found your pinky nail" before you even noticed it was missing.
The guy I brought home last night made a speedy escape while I was in the bathroom. The only trace I found of his flight was a lone sock on the stairs.... It was like a whorey low budget Cinderella
I just sat in the bathtub with the shower running so I could eat the whole box of mega stuffed Oreos. What am I doing with my life
Want to come over and dangle your tits on top of me like a skewer?
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