How do u get a lost condom out? Like really lost... up there...
you turned your livingroom into a bong?
Why dose there have to be another girl there for you to do this?
its hotter. Way hotter.
Well he has that kind of carefree attitude that comes from a big penis
We could be the people that go there! Shuffleboard n shit. Meet strippers.
You had me at shuffleboard and strippers
Well it's official... The first guy I ever gave head to now holds 2 world records. Should I text him asking if I can try and break my record?
The topic of sex in the jamba banana suit has come up on multiple occasions. We're just waiting for a moment to try it out.
We're going to party like we don't have spanx on
Can't tell if waking up covered in easy mac is the sign of an amazing or terrible night
fuck off. It's 10am and I'm drink gin and ginger ale through a twizzler straw. My life is marvellous
I'm wandering around outside asking things if they are god
Well, I told him that it's not all about him. Then I gave him the best blow-job in the history of blow-jobs.
Erin was right. There were bees at the after hours.
Let’s try it, I’ve never had a bad time with sex, tacos and beer.
Is she still on a quest to lick every stranger that enters the bar, or have the restraining orders reached critical mass?
Randomize
