Kenny Powers is just a normal guy with exceptional hair
I'm eating oreos and watching porn. This is your fault.
The greatest thing of my life happened today. I took a shit and it formed a smiley face. It's going to be a fucking fantastic day.
the young, male pastor of my church has a jesus fish tramp-stamp. I made him show me.
he refused to get me toilet paper before we started drinking so I keep wiping with his towel.
Ate pizza for the 3rd time today, can't decide if that's disgusting or an amazing aspect of American culture.
Well I put her head right through the headboard. Thank god the room was under her name.
the cops didn't wanna shut the tailgate down but the strippers weren't allowed to take money without a license or somthing
I miss the good ol' days when we would yell at strangers from your balcony while wearing our mexican ponchos in the middle of the day.
what ever happened to our old dealer?
the number of desperate girls at the gym right now is unfair. it would be cruel not to let one blow me.
You aren't going to like my movie choice because it's a Disney movie, but I am cordially inviting you to the couch for blowjobs.
YOU CAN'T JUST ADD EVERYONE WHO ENTERS MY VAGINA ON FACEBOOK WTF
Sex to movie scores is my best choice of the year. You've had an orgasm but have you had an orgasm with an entire orchestra.
She was riding me and giving me score updates to the basketball game at the same time..... Shes a keeper
So I'm at home coloring while smoking a joint. It can only go down hill from here.
Randomize