i'm sick of taking my pants off and seeing a look of disappointment on the girls face. i want her to be frigthened
She's hot, in a Megan Fox with Down's Syndrome kinda way. Like, she'd win Miss Deliverance Pageant
At least she's the hottest one. Oh well, it's all about stats
I feel like sober is me a distant relative that I only see on christmas..
I just worked out and used handles of vodka as weights. Whoever said alcoholism is detrimental to you health obviously has no fucking idea.
It took me four clicks to get to 2009 on his profile. This can't work.
That haircut screams I'm 35 but I still eat pussy.
The cops walked in to class and arrested 2 guys for possession.
Sundays should be dedicated to Girl Scout cookies, sex, and super hero movies.
I woke up in a hospital at three in the morning only to realize my pee is now going to be orange. I've grown to realize I've made all the right decisions
Boss out of town. Had 2 beers for lunch, a long walk and a bowl...and then in he comes. Blamed obvious intoxication on my pain meds. Back at the bar. This is one of those bad judgement days.
I'm giving head in a stairwell, I'll be back in a few minutes. I'm so ashamed.
No that one bar I got kicked out of got closed so that technically doesn't count
she's pretty fucking smug for someone who has had unprotected sex with a convicted felon
IM HAMMERED AND JUST HAD CHEESECAKE THAT MADE ME FEEL LIKE NO MAN HAS EVER MADE BE FEEL BEFORE.
I think my roomie is silently judging me for spraining my foot by having sex in a bounce house
so the bounce house and tequila was good idea then?
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