Got a toothbrush?
real busy. everything is packed. thats why we ended up at the strip club
I was about to buy asher roth's album and then i realized he was a ginger. can't support
Hey kate, how is it?
sloppy...it's emily. kate just tried to do a keg stand. they dropped her. we're leaving.
To be honest I don't know what's worse, the fact that I interupted their shower sex or the fact that I was so drunk I used the adjoining stall anyway
You pulled me aside and handed me a plastic childrens' tea cup full of 151 and said "trust me its a great idea"
High school girls are buying me shots. This will not end well.
I even got my dealer to make gluten free special cookies ;-)
She just rubbed her face up and down my six pack cooing. Equal measure of weird and hot.
So which one of you fuckers changed my backgrounds while I was passed out to me holding a chicken like the statue of liberty?
Wanna get mid day margaritas tomorrow if I'm still alive
I have bits of ceiling fan all over now
We almost ended up sober because of u!!
i have too much dick at my disposal? i should make them fight. best dick pic gets laid
I don't think we should let her have pot anymore. She ate an entire package of bacon half-cooked and screamed that it was al-dente.
Randomize