I just saw a stripper wear a tube top around her floppy gut. God bless Michigan.
I haven't worn deodorant in like three days and have been laying around in my underwear listening to music and drinking. I think i've made my own Bonnaroo in my apartment.
What can i say, inner beauty is great but it makes a hard picture to jack off to
I also referred to her clitorous as her "vagina dot" last night...probably going to be dumped soon.
I have sand in every orifice, there are bruises everywhere, and I smell like a distillery. I love summer.
I have vomit stuck in my nose, you should come with a warning label.
You couldn't find your shoe so you introduced yourself as Cinderella for the rest of the night.
Ahh that explains the text from creepy mike saying he would be my prince charming.
In either case, seeing now as it's basically two couples, unless we're planning to have a good old fashion orgy I think this isn't going to work out so well.
So your bra was hanging in the Christmas tree last night at some point I think
PUT YOUR FRESHLY SHAVED MEXICAN POON ON THAT BEARD. NOW.
I fucked him on my yoga mat. Then we wake and baked and ate granola. So yes, you could say I found my center.
Good luck. While you're suffocating on a dick, I'll be eating pizza rolls. Being a good girl.
He's going to be in the air guitar championships in june. Need I say more.
Fuck you. Fuck this party. I just wanted to be pretty with a cute little tiara and boys sucking my tits, now i have a hangman game drawn on my face and jello shots in my hair.
I wanted to give you a great birthday party. You know I did.
When I went to pick up Adam from the train station, I found him passed out, covered in gold paint and wrapped in a red blanket. someone had glued a gaudy green rhinestone to his forehead. He looked homeless.
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