he asked me what things i liked that he did in bed, and i told him all the things i hated so he would use it on that new bitch and she wouldnt hook up with him anymore.
you for real need to get over him dude
I love sluts.
I end my prayers with that every single night.
i haven't been laid since the bush administration. it's frustrating.
Some advice for success: 1) Go ugly early, it saves you time and money; 2) If you can't pork a princess, pound a pig for practice; and 3) Beauty is only a light switch away.
ur like the dr phil of bizarro world.
Disadvantage of being gay..... my gag reflexes makes trying to make myself throw up extremely difficult.
Pregaming class all semester has made this final review session more like my introduction to the topic.
I'm tempted to see how fat I can get before he leaves me. It's obvious we're playing a game of chicken here.
But I always wanted my obit to read "Died violently in casino orgy," not "Never woke up from rectal surgery."
because you can't take the autistic girl you're babysitting on a blunt ride.
Seriously my only wish tonight is to be at the club in a sombrero w my shirt off pouring tequila on bitches titties
Just called the consul general of France "dude"
I plan on drinking enough to kill at least 2 frat boys and make an aa meeting weep for joy
I am not a slut. I'm just very open with how much I love to have sex. Stop judging.
It's like those toothpaste commercials where 4 out of 5 dentists would recommend your vagina
I don't know where you went, but if you're anywhere near the liquor, pour me another drink
I got confused. The music was loud, porn was playing, people were grinding, there were hand jobs.
Randomize
