you're drinking in the law library????
...not a bad idea....
probably not a good idea either.
I think I just saw the travelocity gnome in leather chaps.
apparently smacking a customer in the face with his iPhone was not part of the WOW factor we learned in training...
my brother is about to go smoke a joint outside... he's preparing his munchies on the counter beforehand. I admire his responsibility.
I just feel as thought we should spend the day in which we celebrate relationships the same as how we started them. Drunken hook ups.
New rule: gentleman callers are required to bring me gifts of beer when coming over to court you. Tell the monster jam dudes so they know.
Do you think county jail has a Groupon?
And if I don't get arrested for drinking and canoeing over the next 3 days, this hurricane will not have turned out anywhere near as well as I planned
Happy meals everywhere. I think Ronald McDonald Claus visited.
The girl in the stall next to me is puking her brains out, I'd say she had just a good a weekend as us
I gave her some alkaseltzer ad she looked at me lke I was god
Vagic. Defined as a kind of magic one has over a girl's vagina. Used in a sentence... he's an accomplished vagician.
all I know is this drummer better stop eye fucking me while he plays cowbell. it is way too early for that.
And I'm sorry for punching you in the face when I drunkenly threw my sandwich
Doing blow in the bathroom isnt the same without you
Do a rail off the baby station in my honor
I like being woken up by phone calls of you sabotaging marriages
Randomize
