We put her face under a blacklight.....it looked like fireworks
I'm glad the dog doesn't judge me for doing leftover lines and watching George of the Jungle at 10 am
wanna play who's drunker? I just made macaroni & cheese taco and offered it to the pizza Guy as a tip.
he has the hands of the vagina gods.
we bought a duck. we're keeping him in our dorm room. don't ever try to tell me you've had a better freshman year than me.
I'm naked and wearing a cowbell.i love med school.
I dressed up as a breathalyzer test for Halloween; never had so many straight dudes blow me before!
I'm just saying. If this how my magic vagina shows it's magic then I don't want any
I'm looking at some sugar baby profiles to get some insight on what we're up against.
Eating a grilled cheese at a strip club... good idea??
So just what does one wear when attending a sex toy party with ones mother-in-law?
Jeans and a nice top.
These are the last few fleeting sober moments of the day for me. If there is anything you need me to do today, please tell me now
I'm glad you still love me even when I change pants in the kitchen and demand you spoon me
So I've already made 5 bad decisions today, wyd?
It feels like heartburn in my lungs. I'll buy 2 pounds.
Randomize
