found out what b.m.t stands for.
what did you think?
bread, meat, tomatoes, but then i realized that could be practically any sub.
I think the sex offender registry is kind of a VIP list. You get to not live near noisy schools and parks and all your neighbors get to know you.
if i could have babies with my dog i totally would cause i know thay would be fucking hott babies.
theres a boy scout troop on my plane. right now theyre playing wilderness games. let me just tell you how excited i am to hit on all of them
I realized tonight the smell of my dirty pads remind me of my grandfather.
There's somethin not right about having to take the batteries out of your 27 year old boyfriends gameboy to use in your vibrator
You woke up, laughed, proceeded to throw up on me and then passed out again.
I bet his dick wears a tuxedo.
Hey! Where are you? It's Irrisponsible Patio time and you're not here firing shots down summer student's throats
I saw a groundgog last night outside my back door. I now have a new wedding gift idea.
My flask has coffee in it for finals week.. So that's responsible right?
Dougie got over his pride nerves. Found him dancing on a float wearing nothing but rainbow boxers.
I appreciate the I'll come bail you out of jail tone in the text
This is the fifth time tonight that girl has taken off my pants. Take me home. Now.
Finding my pants in the morning should not make me this proud
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