saw you walking with that piece of shit
and that piece of shit just read that
You were in the bathroom for two hours practicing "Revenge Faces".
its like whenever the snow comes all the hott girls drop out of school. where are they
She just used a turkey baster to transfer alcohol from the glass to the bottle. Just thought you should know
Bro, i just sang journey's "dont stop beleavin" at mcdonalds. and the guy was sooo impressed he gave us free food. God i love america
currently wearing a football players overly sized underwear. discovered a shot count on my leg. I'm a tank hahahhh
The saddest thing about graduating is that we won't have free access to STI screening anymore
He threw a twenty at the stripper and asked for change
well did he get it
....yes
it's just weird to think of you as a teacher since ive seen you throw up raspberry bacardi in my parents house
oh, i solved that problem. i told him i wanted to steal my roommate's nephew. radio silence. haven't heard from him since.
Why the fuck was I face down on the floor with you mounting me like a horse anyway? I'm so confused
We always have to do something together that tests the human limits of the body. Hopefully it has at least a 75% death rate.
He's hot, clean, can actually cook, and best of all isn't a narcissistic prick. I found a unicorn.
Ride that fucker.
Just found out my dad smokes weed too. Mom, grandma, all aunts and uncles, and now my dad too. It's like I'm genetically engineered to be a stoner.
Like Napoleon Dynamite?
Exactly like Napoleon Dynamite
But with bacon.
Randomize
